It is the beginning of a New Year and we have been spending some time reflecting on the reason we initially started this blog. We did it with the intention of compiling and sharing information that helps to clarify the chaos of everyday family life. Reconnecting with that intention has inspired us to start off the year sharing one of the top things we both rely on as mothers to keep us going when our exhausted souls need strength and support. It is a simple motto we say to ourselves and repeat frequently to each other – Try and Cry.
The first part of the motto, TRY, is what we use as our inspiration. To us it means that no matter what happened during the day… even if well-intentioned plans went sideways, tempers were lost, interactions were a challenge, complicated situations made us unsure of what to do next or whatever it may have been… if we can just lay our heads down at night knowing nothing more than the next day we will wake up willing to try again, we are doing alright. Things may feel overwhelming and flawed, but if we can remain willing to try we can be proud of the fact that we are doing right for ourselves by showing up for our life and our people day after day and we are doing right for our family by not only giving them the incredibly comforting feelings of love and support that come when someone shows up for you, but by also modeling for our children that no matter what circumstances life throws at you, you can always continue to try.
The second part of the motto, CRY, is what we use as our expectation. To us it means that after we have shown up and tried our best, the only outcome we choose to attach ourselves to is that there will be tears. Our tears could be happy tears, tears of joy or tears from laughing so hard we cry. They can be tears of frustration, sadness, exhaustion, relief, disappointment, or overwhelm. The tears will come from a multitude of reasons and feelings but the thing is, if we stop feeling like our efforts need to yield picture perfect moments, successes that adhere to society’s standards or impressive accolades before we can feel validated, we can free ourselves from so much pressure and instead know and accept that after all our trying we will end up crying because it is normal and ok and because it means we are feeling emotions that come when we are truly invested in our life and our people.
The unpredictability and challenges of family life can feel like so much sometimes. It is our hope that when you are feeling overwhelmed or worn down you can repeat the simple motto of try and cry to yourself or share it with others and it will be a source of the strength and serenity parents so desperately need.
One last note…we love and live this motto so much that we thought it would be fun to share it over to our Instagram page. Over the next couple days, we are going to post some of our favorite photos that we feel reflect the true spirit of try and cry in action. Click here to go to our Clarified Chaos Instagram page where you can follow us and watch for the photos with the hashtag – #tryandcry. We would also love for you to tag us in pictures with the hashtag #tryandcry because photos that are less about perfection and more about beautifully messy family life are something we would enjoy seeing more of.